Disco Fever
by Liz7
Summary: Wufei+Disco=FUNNY! Yaoi hints (well, more like a bash in the head....) 5x13, 6x13, 1x2(really only hints at that one).


1.1 Disco Fever  
  
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Status: complete  
  
Archive: if you want, just tell me  
  
Warnings: lot's of polyester and disco music.  
  
Feedback: Yes, yes, yes! (I sound like the Herbal Essences commercial!) Please review!  
  
Disclaimer: Gundam Wing and its characters belong to Bandai, Sunrise and Sotsu Agency and are only being used for non-profit entertainment purposes. Stayin' Alive belongs to the Bee Gees. I Love the Nightlife belongs to Alicia Bridges. Manhattan Skyline belongs to David Shire. A Fifth of Beethoven belongs to Walter Murphy. Disco Inferno belongs to The Trammps.  
  
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DISCO FEVER  
  
// Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk,  
  
I'm a woman's man: no time to talk. //  
  
A man struts down the street, swinging a can of paint. He waves at people as he walks on. He's all that and a bag of chips.  
  
//Music loud and women warm, I've been kicked around  
  
since I was born. And now it's all right. It's OK. //  
  
Everyone loves this man; he is THE disco king! Everyone respects him, and all of the girls love him. Well, maybe not ALL of the girls, but quite a few do. All the guys respect him, and hey, maybe a few of them love him too.  
  
//And you may look the other way.  
  
We can try to understand  
  
the New York Times' effect on man. //  
  
Words roll across the screen. SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER staring: John Travolta. Travolta is god. Travolta is...  
  
"Hey Wufei! What ya doin'? A voice yelled, breaking Wufei out of his thoughts. He looked up and glared at Duo.  
  
"Watching a video. It's something from the 1970's. Now go away and let me study it." Duo ignored Wufei and sat down next to him.  
  
"No way dude. Heero wants me to do an experiment involving chains and three gallons of Pine Sol. I think I'll hang with you." Wufei's nose started bleeding when he thought about the chains and Pine Sol. Duo snickered. Wufei calmed his gushing nose and turned his attention back to the god, Travolta.  
  
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Now, most people think of Wufei as a very reserved person. He's not the kind of person who would enjoy getting out and shaking his groove thing, right? WRONG! Ever since he discovered Saturday Night Fever he had become a closet disco freak. There was nothing he enjoyed more than getting dressed up in his groovy threads and shakin'. He was well known at the new disco by the house. It had opened a few weeks after the pilots had moved in and Wufei quickly became the disco king. He was planning to go there tonight to make sure he kept his title. He had heard a rumor that someone was coming to beat him. Hah! No one could beat the disco king.  
  
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LATER THAT DAY  
  
"Dude, that was a good movie!" Duo exclaimed. After a few minutes Duo had settled down and actually paid attention to the movie and he was now very glad that he had. It was good. Great music, even better moves! Wufei looked at Duo with a newly found sense of respect.  
  
"Yes, it is good isn't it?" he replied. He always watched the movie before going to the disco. He needed to review his moves. He popped the video out of the VCR and put it in the box. He started up to his room.  
  
"Hey, Wufei!" Duo shouted. Wufei turned around.  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Um..can I borrow the movie?" Duo asked softly. Wufei nodded and gave to box to him.  
  
"But take good care of it Maxwell!" he said. Duo nodded and plopped down on the couch again. Wufei left the room and went up the stairs to his room to prepare for that night.  
  
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THAT NIGHT  
  
Wufei studied himself in the mirror. Very good. This outfit alone would guarantee that he stayed the disco king. He adjusted his collar.  
  
"You are THE man," he told his reflection. His reflection grinned at him. Wufei ran a hand through his loose hair and went to his window. There was no way he would let the others see him like this. He opened the window and jumped out, being careful not to get any dirt on his cloths. Dirt shows up so well on white polyester!  
  
  
  
Wufei approached the entrance to the disco. It was crowded tonight. He read a sign posted on a lamppost. SEE THE KING OF DISCO DEFEND HIS TITLE! TONIGHT ONLY AT THE CLUB OF LOVE! It seems that people wanted to see the king of disco. The crowd parted as he walked by. People whispered in awe as he passed. Hands reached out to touch his polyester clad arms. Yes, Wufei is THE man. He entered the disco and the manager grabbed him.  
  
"Wufei! Thanks for coming! You're on at midnight. I would recommend resting before then." Wufei gave him a contemptuous look. The king of disco rest? Unthinkable.  
  
"I will do what I deem suitable," he informed the manager, and walked to the lit up dance floor. The people on the floor opened up a walkway to the middle of the floor. Wufei stopped when he was directly under the mirrored disco ball. He looked at the DJ and the good man stopped the song he was playing and put it away. He looked at Wufei to see what he should play. Wufei touched his nose then his left eye. The DJ nodded and reached for another record. Wufei placed himself on the floor. He readied himself.  
  
//Action!//  
  
A single word drifted across the dance floor. Wufei spun. The crowd started clapping. The music continued to pulse.  
  
//I love the night life, I got to boogie//  
  
The song continued and so did Wufei. He moved around the floor like a possessed man. People were cheering for him. The cry of "WUFEI" rang throughout the disco. Let them cheer, Wufei thought. This is just a warm up. The final notes of the song ended and Wufei stopped, once again under the disco ball. He bowed and walked off of the floor. People came up to him and told him how he would have no problem keeping his title. He made his way over to the bar. And sitting at it he found quite a surprise. Duo, Heero, Trowa and Quatre were all there. He almost fainted.  
  
"Nice moves Wu-man," Duo said in a conversational tone. Wufei kinda squeaked.  
  
"And I must complement you on your clothing choices," Quatre said. "Wherever did you find so much polyester?" Wufei squeaked again. The manager approached them.  
  
"Do you want me to take care of these wise guys Wufei?" he asked, glaring at the pilots. Wufei shook his head, still incapable of speech. The manager nodded and shot a warning glare at Heero. Bad idea. The master of the Death Glare (TM) glared back. The manager gulped and scurried away to make sure he hadn't wet his pants. During all of this Wufei had regained his ability to speak.  
  
"What are you guys DOING here?!" he asked. Duo snickered.  
  
"Well, after watching that movie I remembered that there was a genuine 1970's disco around here so I talked the rest of these guys into going. We came to test out our moves. But I can see that we're no competition for you, Wu-man."  
  
"Yes, well, no one is competition to me. I am the disco king after all." Duo had picked a good subject to talk about. Wufei kept them all entertained until midnight with his stories of all of the people he had danced against. All of the stories ended with Wufei making them look like idiots and having them grovel at his feet.  
  
Finally, the clock struck 12 and the manager came to collect Wufei, keeping a safe distance from Heero. He escorted him to the back room where he would meet his competition. He entered the small room and gasped when he saw his opponent. Treize Kushrenada was sitting in a chair sipping on a drink. Wufei decided that this would be a perfect time to faint and did so.  
  
  
  
Wufei woke up wondering why his head was in a lap. And why the lap was covered in pinstripe polyester. Then he remembered. Treize was his competition. He turned his head and found himself looking straight into sapphire eyes. Forked eyebrows raised as Treize looked at Wufei.  
  
"Well, it seems that we meet again my dragon," he said in a soft voice. Wufei groaned and sat up. The manager helped him up off of the ground.  
  
"You OK Wufei?" he asked.  
  
"Never better," Wufei responded. He turned around to face Treize. Treize was dressed in a white shirt with a collar out to there. Over the shirt was a pinstripe coat. His pants matched his coat. All made of polyester, what else? The shirt was had a few buttons opened and he had a little collection of gold chains against his chest. He was dressed to perfectly contrast Wufei. Wufei was clad in a black shirt with the collar and a white vest, coat, and pants. All polyester. Wufei had also put on some gold chains. They both looked like they had stepped out of the 1970's.  
  
"I can't hold the crowd much longer," the manager said. He looked at Wufei. "You sure you're OK?" Wufei nodded. The manager turned to Treize. "You're up first," he said. Treize looked at Wufei.  
  
"Best of luck," he said and strode out of the room. Wufei gulped and followed him out. The crowd had all cleared off of the dance floor and had found seats or standing spots around it. Duo, Heero, Trowa and Quatre had all moved up closer to the floor and were now staring at Treize. Duo looked at Heero.  
  
"Have I gone insane?! I see Treize Kushrenada, the leader of OZ and the poster boy for snotty aristocrats everywhere dressed in polyester!"  
  
"If you've gone insane, so have I. I see him too," he responded shuddering with Duo. Treize walked onto the floor and over to the DJ stand. He talked to him in a hushed voice. The DJ nodded a few times and reached for a record. Treize stepped out onto the floor. The manager grabbed a microphone.  
  
"Ladies and gentlemen, tonight you will witness the battle of the kings! We have Treize Kushrenada, the self appointed king of disco from the Lake Victoria OZ base, challenging our very own king of disco, Chang Wufei!!" The crowd erupted. "First up is Treize!" Treize was standing under the disco ball, positioned in the typical disco position, arm raised, finger pointing to the sky.  
  
The DJ put the record on. The song, Manhattan Skyline came on. Wufei pondered Treize's choice. An instrumental song. Well, Wufei supposed he would use one too. Treize moved around the floor with all of the grace he had. He was groovin', Wufei had to admit. The rest of the Gundam pilots stared at their archenemy burnin' up the dance floor. They were still in shock from seeing Treize in polyester. The four-minute song came to a close and Treize bowed. The crowd clapped loudly. He had done well. The manager started to worry. Wufei was still looking a little pale from fainting, he wasn't sure if he could beat Treize. Wufei stepped out onto the floor, brushing by Treize in the process. Treize grinned at him; Wufei tried to ignore it. He looked at the DJ and held up five fingers. The DJ nodded and grabbed a record. Wufei took his place under the mirrored ball.  
  
The opening measures of Beethoven's Fifth Symphony floated across the dance floor. Treize grinned. Ah. So he picked A Fifth of Beethoven (1). Another instrumental. He always had to fight fair. The music began to pick up speed and energy. Wufei showed his stuff. All of his insecurities floated away. What did he have to worry about? He was THE man! Wufei grooved. And everyone knew it. When Wufei danced his ego soared. He was the man; he had nothing to worry about. The song came to a close and Wufei had ended up under the disco ball again. He bowed to the audience, then bowed to Treize. He had won this battle! The manager bounded out onto the dance floor.  
  
"Well folks, we have a winner! All of our judges have declared Chang Wufei the ULTIMATE king of disco!" The crowd went wild. They knew he could do it! He was Chang Wufei, what did they have to worry about? The DJ put another song on and Wufei walked off of the dance floor. All of the pilots congratulated him, but he didn't care, what he wanted was to hear what Treize had to say. He went over to the leader of OZ. Treize smiled at him as he approached.  
  
"Well my dragon, it seems you have won. Congratulations. So, will you continue to fight me?"  
  
"No Treize, justice has been served. Justice is justice, even if it is served on a dance floor. No, I will no longer seek you to fight. Farewell LOSER!" Wufei bounced back to the dance floor.  
  
"Loser?" Treize said out loud, looking perplexed. He sat down on a barstool. Man, why'd I lose? He asked himself. Why? Suddenly, he felt a hand on his back. He turned around. It was Wufei.  
  
"May I have this dance?" he asked. Treize grinned.  
  
"Most certainly, my dragon," he replied. Wufei led him to the dance floor. The DJ didn't even wait to see what Wufei requested. He put on the slowest song he had. Wufei and Treize swayed together on the dance floor. Wufei wasn't paying much attention to the people around him, but he did notice that they passed Heero and Duo and Heero was saying something about Pine Sol. Wufei was feeling very relaxed and was really enjoying himself, when something very unexpected happened. He was pulled off of Treize and flung halfway across the dance floor. He looked up and saw that the person that had done it was none other then Zechs Merquise. His blond hair was flying around him like a windstorm. He had the look of death in his eyes.  
  
"You.you ...you little bastard!" he yelled at Wufei. The he turned to Treize. "And you're no better you little tramp! Sure, you're big bad Treize, but that doesn't mean you can get into the pants of every man you come across. And a Gundam pilot no less! How would you feel if I suddenly decided to like Heero over there?!" Treize considered this.  
  
"Would there be any chance of a foursome?" he asked. Zechs considered THAT.  
  
"Maybe. I don't know." He looked at Heero. Heero looked very scared. The manager came over.  
  
"Um, could you guys take this outside? You're scaring away customers." Treize looked at Wufei.  
  
"Coming dragon?" Wufei shook his head.  
  
"I still have some groove left in me."  
  
Treize nodded. "I understand. Come Zechs. You must let me make this all up to you."  
  
Zechs smiled. "Of course Treize," he purred. They left the Club of Love arm in arm. Wufei looked at the DJ and pointed to his mouth. The DJ consulted his list of hand signs and nodded. He took the record and began to play it. The disco music flowed through the club. Everyone got caught up in it. Wufei moved effortlessly around the floor, dancing with everyone. All kings have to communicate with their subjects. And he communicated through dance.  
  
//Burn baby, burn  
  
Burn baby, burn  
  
Burn baby, burn  
  
Burn baby, burn//  
  
After almost three hours of dancing Wufei got tired and decide to head for home. The other pilots had left earlier, so Wufei didn't have to look for anyone. He said good night to the manager and promised to come back. He was the king after all. He stepped out of the hot club and into the cool night. As he walked away from the building he chuckled to himself:  
  
"The king has left the building!"  
  
//Disco Inferno//  
  
*owari*  
  
(1): Yes, there is a disco version of Beethoven's Fifth Symphony. I'm not making it up. It's on the Saturday Night Fever Soundtrack. I'm not making it up.  
  
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Well? If you like it go take a look at some of my other things! Please review!  
  
-Liz  
  
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